Arriving in Guatemala

It takes me a while to integrate and readjust back to my “regular” life after a retreat.

It’s the contraction after the expansion. They come together and you can’t have one without the other.

My nervous system went through a lot on this one. Traveling to a country that I’d never been to before, unsure of the infrastructure and guiding 3 others from the airport to the retreat center many hours away.

Once arriving at the airport in Guatemala a few hours after we were supposed to, we found our driver waiting but a bit confused on where to take us. There was a definite language barrier and he seemed very unwilling to take us to our airbnb which I thought was three hours away, he claimed it was actually 5. I was in no condition after a long day of flights to drive for 5 hours. So in a cramped van in almost unmoving Guatemala City Friday evening traffic, horns honking, people selling snacks in the middle of the road, American fast food signs glaring, I had to pivot and find us a new place to stay.

I had also just received the news that Lennox wasn’t feeling well which added immensely to my emotional burden as the mom guilt and “I should be home with him” started to settle in. I felt so far away, so outside of any comfort, and still without a place to sleep that night in a foreign country. My Memere, who I have a very close relationship to, is recovering from a fall and a head injury. I hated to leaver her too.

So I gave myself a pep talk, pulled it together and found a guesthouse that the Yoga Forest (where our retreat was) recommended in Antigua, a closer town that is known as a tourist stop over. The owners of A Place to Stay answered my desperate email quickly, assured us they had a place for us to stay, and said that they would be waiting.

I also called Brian to check in on Lennox. I told my traveling companions that I was going to cry a lot, but that I wasn’t losing it, I was focused and aware of the task at hand but I had to have a good cry to release all of these conflicting and confusing emotions. (Sidenote: goal for 2020- make crying 100% totally natural, normal, and ok in public spaces and with others. No more secret crying all the time!)

After a dark hilly ride, maybe it was 2 hours?, we arrived to the cobblestone streets of Antigua, a beautiful old city. Our driver had to stop and ask a few times for directions and I REALLY had to pee but we finally found it and were warmly greeted into the tropical courtyard and shown to our rooms. They were simple with two beds, some shelves, and a night table. The toilet and showers were shared in the hallway. The blankets were colorful, the beds were comfy, and I think I actually slept some which doesn’t always happen on my first few nights of traveling.

I awoke with the dogs barking and roosters crowing, which was to happen every morning in Guatemala, feeling a lot better than I did the night before but still unsettled and unsure. Keri, ironically a Bostonian who runs the guesthouse with her Guatemalan husband Raul, made us delicious oatmeal with homemade peanut butter for breakfast. It was so warm and comforting even if I only ate half the bowl over an hour. My appetite and whole digestion system shifts when I travel, I am so ruled by emotion!

Their guesthouse is known for the cats, and rabbits, that they rescue so there were many feline friends to greet us and keep us company. Even though it was only for one night, Raul and Keri showed us wonderful hospitality and made our first night in Guatemala safe and memorable and I think it only cost $15 per person for the room, shower, and breakfast. Raul arranged a van to bring us to San Marcos la Laguna, the village on the lake below the Yoga Forest.

Traveling is always worth it. Even when its hard, you know that you are pushing your boundaries and becoming a more fulfilled human for having had the experience. Getting uncomfortable and overcoming the discomfort leads to being filled with the confidence of trusting yourself to work your way out of a situation that you once saw no solution for. And makes you more prepared for the next risk, the next chance of something shifting from what it is to what it can be.